The Joy of Giving Up

Sometimes the Today Show or some other apparently innocent TV show sneaks in a session on fashion or beauty. They demonstrate how to put false eyelashes on or the hottest new six inch heels. For a minute, I watch and then I laugh maniacally and turn the channel or even -gasp!- turn the TV off because I DON'T CARE!

My hair is turning grey, getting long and straggly. When it annoys me, I yank it into a ponytail. I use good shampoos to avoid allergens but I don't blow it dry or use a curling iron or straightener. Why should I? I don't care if it's the latest style.

My eyelashes are invisible and my blond eyebrows are shaggy. I wish I had long, black lashes to bat when I flirt but I am not going to take Latisse. I rarely even wear mascara. I am much more concerned about the health of my eyes and vision than their looks.

My fingernails are short and soft. I got a manicure once (thanks to Pat) but the polish slipped off the next day. I actually USE my hands and they're covered with glue and paint and ink and the only glitter they ever see was supposed to be on a project. I wash them a lot and use moisturizer to keep them healthy and in good working order. End of story.

I wear comfortable shoes -kind of ugly ones with orthotics to tell the truth. In fact, I'd rather be barefoot. My dogs can't breathe with shoes on and if my dogs ain't happy, I ain't happy. I don't understand how women can wear high heels with pointy toes. Seems to me those shoes were designed by sadistic men. It's not all that different from Chinese foot-binding except you can take them off.

I wear jeans and yoga pants with shapeless shirts. I haven't worn a dress or skirt in years (chafing you don't want to know about). My lingerie doesn't come from Victoria's Secret (I don't think they carry my size). For me, a good day means I don't have to wear a bra (TMI?)


I like seeing beautiful clothes. I am entranced by colors and fabrics. But I am sorry to say that a lot of recent fashion trends have left me scratching my head.  Low cut jeans that expose a muffin top or even a crack? Ick.  Drop crotch jeans? Idiotic.

I'm not a big fan of blindly following any rules, especially those of fashion but lately it seems that the industry is just testing us.

In my youth, mixing plaids and stripes and patterns were "Glamour Don'ts." Now this is a hot trend? I like all the pieces

individually but grouped on one body at one time, they give me a headache. She looks like a runaway who is wearing her entire wardrobe.

Would this be a good look for me? How can I make this fashion trend fit my lifestyle? I don't care.

I try to eat healthfully because I want to live to see my potential grandchildren get married. I work out because I want to be able to dance at their weddings. The End.